Friday, July 20, 2012

Batman Begins, The Dark Knight, The Dark Knight Rises - It's not what's beneath, but what we do that defines us

I'm here to write a review and talk about movies. But I would like to take a second and say that my heart goes out to those involved in the shooting in Colorado. I am truly sorry for your losses.



I went and saw all three Batman films last night done by Christopher Nolan. Let's start off at the very beginning. Let's wind the clocks back to 1995 with Batman Forever...what happened? Did your balls drop off? You ravaged the image of Batman that Tim Burton left in his wake. Batman Forever and Batman and Robin were God awful, soiling the legendary hero's name. Well, Mr. Nolan, you have changed things, forever, there is no going back. There was a bar set by you, and it is a bar that only you could reach and topple. Batman Begins was directed by Christopher Nolan. This film starred Christian Bale, Micheal Caine, Liam Neeson, Katie Holmes, Morgan Freeman, and Gary Oldman. Batman Begins was filmed in 2005 reigniting the franchise from a greatly needed hibernation. This franchise was rebuilt from the ground up, making  the city of Gotham seem more realistic, easier to relate to. The story of Bruce Wayne and him becoming Batman was much darker. Although, the new story line was welcome, the constant flashbacks and some of them being repeated got annoying. I almost felt spoon-fed his memories, making sure I recall every moment. With Nolan sending the message that Gotham is ready to believe in good, maybe you should believe that not all of your viewers are morons. Every character was integrated with the story naturally making them feel right. I did have issues with Katie Holmes, I guess that's why she wasn't in number two. I did like the villain choice, Scarecrow and Ra's al Ghul were good practice for what's to come. The plot was simplistic, and a lot of superhero movies have done. Let's spray everyone with poisonous gasses, ohhhh scary! It's been done. The acting was great, and it was wonderful to see the caped crusader back in action and done right. I give Batman Begins a 3 1/2 out of 4.

The Dark Knight, do I really need to say anything more? Well some may need some convincing, but I won't blow anything out of proportion. It has been a long time coming, and I have been waiting to review this movie. So, here, we, go. Adding to the cast was Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, and Maggie Gyllenhaal who replaced Katie Holmes. Christopher Nolan had Gotham in his hands now, able to mold this metropolis into what ever he wanted. So he destroyed it. Here he truly tested Batman's limits. He could either die a hero, or live long enough to see himself become the villain. Well we aren't quite there yet. The first ten minutes of this movie absolutely blew me away. Giving you just a taste of the Joker, and leaving you craving more. His psyche, and lack of motive was intriguing, he's kind of like a dog chasing a car, he wouldn't know what to do with it if he actually caught one. Heath actually gave you the sense that what ever doesn't kill you only makes you...stranger. I know there are those who would disagree with me, but the Joker played by Heath, was and still is by far one of the greatest characters/villain in any movie. Heath was a one man wrecking crew in this film. I don't even need to mention the other actors. None-the-less, I shall. The new characters flowed seamlessly with the old characters, giving very few hiccups to the story, if any. The acting was flawless, I don't care what the critics and haters say. The plot was great, twisted, and forced heroes and bystanders alike to question their morals, and how far they are willing to go. The sheer complexity and simplicity of the Joker has made him Batman's true nemesis. He was named the greatest villain of all time; just for the small sheer fact that he found human suffering absolutely hilarious. This character is off his fucking rocker, but I am insanely jealous that he wasn't mine to create. The Dark Knight, this was the movie to beat, and in my eyes still is. By any superhero movie. I give The Dark Knight a 5 out of 4. Another Unicorn, with one little issue. That stupid wall ride with the motorcycle...ew.

What are they saying? What does it mean? ...Rise. You, you were Gotham's reckoning. The deal was already sealed with the last film. How do you conquer such a mountain? You rise. The Dark Knight Rises is the supposed last film in the Nolan franchise. New to the cast was Tom Hardy, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Anne Hathaway, and Marion Cotillard. Taking the mantel of head villain in this movie was Bane. From my knowledge Bane wasn't a very solid mastermind, or lead bad guy for that matter. Before and after seeing the film I believe that he wasn't the right choice to end this franchise on. This was to end all Batmans, so lets shove a little brute force down their throats. Sorry, I might be a brute, but I like my villainy to be deep and meaningful. The plot was lacking, and felt a little repetitive, making me care very little about the problems Gotham was facing. Bane's entrance in the film seemed forced and a little stupid to me. His dialogue and the way he spoke was also annoying. But, out of all the Bane that was brought upon us, I felt very real tension, and great build up all the way to the end of the film. There was very serious calamity about to hit Gotham, and the air thickened as the films time progressed. Outside of the suite, even Bruce Wayne felt the force of Bane's assault, leaving the situation very grim. Excluding Bane, the other characters made themselves right at home within the Batman family, as if they had been there this whole time. Among them, a star, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, what was your full name again? This boy did well beyond my expectations, as he always has. This movie wasn't bad, it had very big shoes to fill, almost impossible expectations to reach. Other reviews claim that this was the greatest film of the franchise, that it shattered any and all expectations, I must disagree. I can't compare and judge this film to its predecessors, it wouldn't be fair. The Dark Knight Rises, was a good film but I do not believe it had risen to my expectations. I give The Dark Knight Rises a 3 out of 4. Fear is why you fail, but it is darkest just before the dawn, and I believe it will not end on this note.

 

Friday, July 13, 2012

Ice Age: Continental Drift - No matter what, you never leave a friend behind

HA! Well I have yet to experience that quality in another human outside immediate family. But I assume that's my fault. So Ice Age, again, I can't believe they made a fourth, and continued to add to the cast. Well I will stick to the main cast if you don't already know. This film stars Ray Romano, Denis Leary, and John Leguizamo. The directors are Steve Martino and Mike Thurmeier. I really liked the first Ice Age, maybe that's what keeps me coming back, or its that fucking rat. There wasn't a real story that I cared about in this fourth installment, just separation anxiety. The only real scenes that I looked forward to and laughed about were the ones with Skrat. I paid fifteen bucks to watch an animal that acts like my sisters retarded dog... But any who, there were no real jumps made with the animation, lackluster story, and they tried way to hard with the jokes. The introduction to the new characters felt a little forced. And the integration with the personalities of the moronic generations that have appeared after me was insufferable. "Hey that landslide was EPIC!" " I know right?" Was it? Was it fucking 'Epic'? God, Hollywood, please please leave that shit in the fucking dumpster where it belongs. Back to the story. If the preceding films had any kind of connection this would be a neat little franchise. But they don't, leaving the movies a jumbled mess of forced laughter and a squeamish sloth. Unfortunately I see more Ice Age movies in the future, hopefully leading to a conclusion. I give Ice Age: Continental Drift a 1 1/2 out of 4. The end is near, and things are at their bleakest. But even at the finish there is a light, even at the end of the world.

Sunday, July 8, 2012

The Amazing Spider-man - Do you have any idea what you really are?

And they say that hero can save us, I'm not...wait, wrong movie. Sorry about that. Spider-Man, what can I say, Amazing, Spectacular, Fantastic, Ultimate, all of these describe him funny enough. The stars of The Amazing Spider-Man were Andrew Garfield, Emma Stone, Rhys Ifans, and Denis Leary. The director was Marc Webb...Webb, HA! He also did (500) Days of Summer and a slew of musical documentaries. This is the supposed untold story of Peter Parker and what happened with his parents. Well this plot wasn't necessarily tackled as much as it probably should have. There was a major diversion, but this diversion was nice and very welcoming. I had a smile on my face the entire time this movie was playing. It wasn't the exact story that I know, but it was still Fantastic. Andrew Garfield captured Peter Parker/Spider-Man almost perfectly, his action stunts and comedic taunts didn't miss a beat, and outside the costume he played the distant and nerdy boy with Amazing accuracy. The story was fun, the actors did very well, and the best part was that the spider costume wasn't always in CG like the last batch of fuck ups. With all of this going for it, hopefully this franchise can prove to be as Spectacular as it promises to be. I hated the idea of another Spider-Man, starting the story over, reintroducing the characters. It all seemed stupid. But I was wrong, thankfully I was very wrong. This was refreshing, with the last Spider-Man fiasco this was needed, redemption was sorely needed after Tobey FuckHead Maguire drug the Spider-Man name through the mud. As the franchise continues I hope that the ball isn't dropped and this becomes the Ultimate Spider-Man that our movie world needs. In the Marvel universe there are Gods, Titans, creatures that can swallow worlds whole, there are villains that command worlds of armies, heavy hitting hero's, The Avengers, X-men, I can go on and on. It is said by his peers, his enemies, and his readers, and now I will say it. Spider-Man is truly the greatest hero of all time, and I believe this movie captured a little bit of that. Despite the plot disruption, I give The Amazing Spider-Man a 4 out of 4. With good people there comes the ability to help others who need it. With good, comes the moral responsibility to do so.